Monday, May 26, 2008

Crop Dusting!

Alright ladies, Candid Carrie wrote a hysterical post about the affects of dairy products on her bowels. This reminded me of an evening I spent with my husband and his friend Joe and I thought I would share it all with you. When your done here you should really check out Carrie's post, it's worth it I promise!

So one Saturday evening a few years ago Dave, his friend Joe, and I went out to dinner and then to a movie. The evening started like a normal evening out with friends. We went to Logan's Steakhouse for dinner and it was good but nothing special. Dave and Joe were actually behaving themselves for once which was kind of a surprise to me because when those two get together they seem to turn into 13 year old boys. I actually remember thinking to myself that those two were actually acting like men.

Well I guess I jinxed myself because as we were walking out of the restaurant the hostess, who normally says goodbye or have a nice day, didn't say anything to us but instead she gave us a very nasty look. Now my husband can not stand stuck up people like this so he decided in a split second to crop dust her.

If you don't know what crop dusting is; it's when you fart while walking by someone and you keep walking so you don't have to smell the affects.

Back to the story, I was walking in front of both Dave and Joe so I didn't hear Dave do this but I was almost run over by the two of them running out the door. Once we were outside I turned around and started yelling at Dave and Joe for running me over and pushing me out the door, but it wasn't worth it because they were laughing so hard that they couldn't walk. I finally got them to calm down and tell me what was so funny. I was so embarrassed by what Dave had done but we didn't have to go back in so I let it go.

Off to the movies we went. When I started writing this I couldn't remember what movie it was we had gone to see but just now it came back to me and it couldn't be a more perfect time. The movie we saw that night was Borat and it was a fitting movie for both the guys to have gas during. I am pretty sure the people sitting around us heard and smelled what was going on and it was very very very embarrassing for me as well as hilarious. Why is it that farts and gas are so funny even as adults?

After the movie we were walking through the parking garage to our car and there were these two men walking behind us very close. Actually to close, we sped up, we scooted farther to the left but these men stayed right on top of us. Just as we got to our car Dave stopped very suddenly so that one of the men almost ran him over, he lifted his leg, stuck his butt out and farted as loud and long as he could. I could have died at that moment of both laughter and embarrassment! The look on that man's face was priceless and I wish I could describe it for you. The best I can do is to say that it was a combination of confusion and disgust. I think it's probably safe to say that these men will think twice before walking so close to strangers.

So there you have it, the story of my evening spent crop dusting!

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